In March of 2016 I was sitting at a table in the hanger at Mercy Flight Central, doing patient scenario’s for prospective new flight nurses and paramedic s. I was grumpy that day and really didn’t want to be sitting there. I glanced up as the door opened and my next candidate walked through. The first thought I had when I saw her was “Wow, she’s beautiful”. My next thought was “I’m going to marry her”. Then she walked up to the table and I saw rings on her hand. My heart sank and I thought “I guess I’m wrong”. I went through the scenario and put her through the ringer. As she tells the story, I was the jerk who killed her patient! As I tell the story, I was in a bad mood and everyone’s patient died that day! Long story short, she was the only one who impressed me with both knowledge and skill. She was honest, brutally so, and wasn’t afraid to admit what she didn’t know. She was also a sponge for knowledge and asked a ton of questions. In the end, of all the people I evaluated that day, she was the only one that I said we should hire. My bosses agreed with me and soon she was one of our newest flight nurses.
Long story short, little did I know when I met her, but she was in the start of a nasty divorce, one that would cost her friends, family and so much more. Over the course of the next year we became friends, and in January of 2017 we started dating. I asked her to marry me on July 15th of that year and after a whirlwind engagement and planning session, we were married in the lawn of what was later to become SaJe Family Farm on September 1st of the same year. Yes, this amazing woman planned a wedding, at her own house, in 6 weeks!
She already had 4 kids when we met, so with the utterance of “I do’s” on both sides of the alter, we entered the amazing, messy, fun, terrifying, crazy, frustrating, exhilarating world of the non-traditional, blended family. Being a step-dad is the hardest jobs I have every done…no, it is probably the second hardest job, being a husband is the hardest. At the same time, being a husband and being a step-dad are also the most amazing jobs I have ever done. I wouldn’t trade them for the world. We may not meet the traditional definition of “family”, but honestly, not many do anymore. I tell my kids all the time that our relationship is special. I got to choose to be their step-dad. I met them before I became their step-dad and I got to make the conscious choice to take on that job. In my opinion, sometimes being non-traditional is more amazing than the traditional route. It comes with unique challenges, unique problems, unique frustrations, but it also comes with unique rewards.
Given the unique, non-traditional family that runs SaJe Family Farm, it is kind of cool to see that we aren’t the only non-traditional families on the farm. This spring we hatched several goslings in our incubators, and raised them in a brooder box in the house with one lone duckling who needed company. When they got old enough to go outside, we carried them out in a box and a trio of male geese (ganders) decided that they were their babies. Those three males have cared for and raised the goslings (and the tag along duckling) as their own ever since.
A couple of months ago we had two rabbits give birth a couple days apart. The later mother to give birth rejected her litter and ate most of them. My wife decided to try something unconventional and took the living babies from her nest and put them in with the other mother’s babies. Rabbits are not known to take kindly to other babies, but this mom adopted them as her own and raised them right alongside her own babies.
Last week we had two hens, in adjacent nesting boxes, hatch their clutches of eggs on the same morning. When I went out to the coop, both mothers were on the floor, calling to their babies to jump down to them. Not knowing which box belonged to which hen, I figured the hens would be able to figure it out and helped all of the chicks out of the nesting boxes and onto the floor. All of the babies ended up in one big group and amazingly, the hens took it all in stride. We now have two hens, co-raising a mixed group of chicks belonging to both of them. They sit together and allow all of the babies to take shelter under their combined bodies. They walk together around the yard and both keep a watchful eye over the entire group of chicks.
The other day we found a nest near our front picket fence. In it we found a mix of turkey, duck and guinea hen eggs. The most amazing thing is that a female duck and a female turkey have both claimed the nest, and instead of fighting over it, sit side by side, each covering a portion of the nest. Throughout the day they take turns getting off the nest and going out to forage. During the time that one is gone, the other sits on the nest. When they are both back, they move around and take up position, side by side, sitting on their nest.
We have had chickens hatch duck eggs and ducks hatch chicken eggs. All around our farm you can see some of the most unique conglomerations of parents and babies that you could ever imagine. We think it is kind of cool. From our non-traditional family, to our non-traditional farm where we raise animals for meat and eggs and pets…and work to ensure that each has the best life possible, nothing is as you might expect it to be. But, we wouldn’t change it for the world.